Get in, we’re stanning Tate McRae.

On her new album So Close To What

Is she the new Britney Spears? Can she sing? Is she hot? Is she mother? Is she giving what needs to be gave? Who is this? All of these questions can be heard at a gay afters when a Tate McRae song comes on. Followed by someone doing the “It’s ok I’m ok” choreography (it’s Sean Bankhead, how could you not??). Most of your opinions on Tate McRae are wrong.

She’s not the new Britney, but that’s because Britney was releasing pure pop before a foray into Janet Jackson-inspired dance music and McRae was releasing sad white girl Billie Eilish songs before delving into trap hop anthems. Low key, she’s like Portishead for the club. Can she sing? Yes. Can you understand what she’s saying? No. But that didn’t stop Ariana Grande for the first four albums. Is she hot? Yes. Gays debating the “hotness” of a pop star is wild because ugly people don’t even get in the door, first of all. Second, all dancers are hot. Is she mother? Not mine. Is she giving what needs to be gave? Well, yes. I’m not sure how many of you remember the dark ages of pop — circa Britney’s Femme Fatale Tour where the other pop girls decided they didn’t need to dance anymore. One Direction, much as I love them, thrived during this era. They’re as much responsible for the era of pop stars who don’t dance as Lana Del Rey is. Speaking of One Direction, Benson Boone is clearly reheating their nachos (biting their style, for the old readers) on his upcoming single “Sorry I’m Here for Someone Else.”

This is a good thing though, because that music is great (Sabrina Carpetner did the same on her latest album, check the producers), and also Benson realizes that he needs to be doing literal gymnastics on stage to get attention in the current pop climate. No more standing around like we’re at a coffee shop jam session!

Anyway, back to Tate McRae. The album leaked before it dropped and I sent to it my group thread and one prominent DJ friend of mine responded “no one wants this, also you’re going to jail.” Wow! And when he ends up remixing a McRae song I will provide the receipts, proof, and timeline or him being a hater! It’s okay to not vibe with Tate McRae but to be a hater right now when she is clearly serving is unwell behavior. Because she IS serving. The choreo in the “Revolving Door” video is unreal.

That’s a real ass bitch no matter how you slice it so put some respect on her name. And the album has hits. Now, yes, some of them are definitely snatching vibes from 2000s songs we love (this Switched on Pop episode on her music production is essential, even if their fans think they were too mean to Tate McRae in the episode… these are clearly children who’ve never had to defend liking *NSYNC over the Backstreet Boys in middle school like real adults, leave your feelings at the door when discussing pop music!) like “Buttons” and “The Whisper Song.” But this is music for people who dance on the 2 and the 4. People who do not will be mystified by her popularity and that’s okay. Now run back “Bloodonmyhands” because Flo Milli’s verse is HOT.